Losing It...

I never thought i would change for a guy. I am not saying that i did change. But i am really not sure. And i really don't like the new me. I mean i feel great and all yeah yeah (not so great, though), but then, i don't feel myself. I feel lost. VERY. The only thing about me being in love (oh crap!) is probably improving my writing skills/ rioting- kills.
I have been posting more often becuz HELL i dunt have anyone to talk to here. I have people who'll listen to me if i say i wanna talk ...but its not the same. I guess i am not comfortable. I will soon, inshaAllah. I feel like i am cheating on everyone (how? what?). LOL.
And no, thats not a pleasant feeling.
There are times when i try talking you know. I try to start to *talk* everything out, but sumhow the dialogue transfers to a monologue of the other person. And i go all * how did the conversation even become ABOUT YOU?* seriously man. I jus nod and smile and go "oh yeah" or " i kno what ur talking bout *nod-nod*". Why is life so unfair?

Class today was... crazy. We were taught only two periods- maths n english- the rest of the day we had to practice our Shakespearan Play for tomorrow. My classmates have gathered at one friend's place to rehearse today evening- right now i mean. Unfortunately i am stuck in a room of 4 self- centered people (lol, jokin), with their heads stuck in one position and eyes staring into their respective laptops. Today was a little crappy too... in terms of... skit going haphazard and all. But i guess we'll gather everything up. Oh did i say "we"? becuz it shd've been "they". Yeah "they'll" manage it all. I was a very neutral, or rather a very invisible person in class today.
Yup. I thought i was lost. But i was ACTUALLY transparent...

P.S.: we n Farz n Tia tried out Ouija today. And it worked. I m so turnin evil...